Okay so I finally had time to tackle that olivia woodman project this weekend. Been planning it for ages, sketched ideas on napkins and everything. Thought it was gonna be simple, right? Yeah, famous last words.
Getting Started (The Fun Part)
Dragged out my old plywood pieces from the garage. Dust was everywhere, made me sneeze like crazy. Grabbed my measuring tape and pencil – totally winged it instead of following the sketch like I probably should’ve. Marked the rough shapes:
- The main body panel
- Two curved bits for the sides
- A weird little top piece I added on a whim
Took my jigsaw to it. Noise was awful, neighbors probably hated me. Cutting the curves? Not my best work, looked kinda jagged. “Good enough,” I mumbled. Sanded the edges, but honestly? Probably not enough. Smooth-ish was the goal that day.
Where Things Went South
Time for assembly. Pulled out the wood glue and clamps. Slathered the glue on the edges of the main panel, stuck the side curves on. Clamped it up real tight, thought it would hold fine. Walked away to let it dry, feeling pretty smug.
Came back an hour later – disaster! The clamp pressure wasn’t even. One curved piece was pulling away at the top corner. Tried pushing it back, sticky glue got all over my fingers. Panicked a bit, tried adding more glue and clamping harder. Nope. Heard this awful crack sound. That corner I rushed on the jigsaw? Totally splintered. Ruined the piece. Seriously considered just kicking the whole mess across the yard.
The Fix (Sort Of…)
No more plywood big enough for another side piece. Wasn’t driving back to the store. Salvage mission started. Found a scrap chunk of pine. Hacked off a smaller square block with the jigsaw. Sanded it roughly smoothish again (still not great). Covered the split plywood corner with this new block. Slapped glue everywhere, used screws this time – learned my lesson on just glue, I guess. Covered the messy join with duct tape while it dried because I was out of clamps and frustrated. Looked ridiculous.
Finishing Up… With Scars
Peeled off the duct tape – surprisingly, the glue held the block on. Wonky as heck, but together. Sanded the whole thing again, trying to smooth over the Frankenstein corner. Put on two coats of this dark walnut stain I had left over. At least the stain hid some of the worst sins. Let it dry overnight.
Next day? It stands. It’s functional. But man, it’s got character in all the wrong ways. The Frankenstein corner is obvious. The curves aren’t matched. Feels sturdy enough, though. Tried sanding that rough pine patch too fast before the final coat – got a nasty splinter for my troubles.
Lessons Learned (The Hard Way)
- Measure twice, cut once is not just a dumb saying. My sketch exists for a reason.
- Jigsaw curves require patience I sometimes lack. Sanding before assembly matters way more than I thought.
- Clamps need to distribute pressure evenly. My rush job pulled it apart.
- Don’t rely just on glue for structural joins on imperfect pieces – especially my imperfect pieces. Screws save face (and corners).
- Duct tape is a temporary fix, not a miracle worker. Looks terrible.
- Sanding new wood fast = guaranteed splinters. Pay attention.
So yeah. The olivia woodman prototype exists. It’s ugly, tells the story of my screw-ups, and honestly? Might be kindling next winter. But hey, finished something, learned what not to do next time. Win? Maybe. My thumb says no.
