Alright, folks, sat down this morning thinking about that viral post on Jordan Barrett’s routine, you know, the one promising god-tier abs? Yeah, felt inspired but also skeptical. So, I decided to ditch my usual boring chest day and actually try mimicking what he supposedly does for a week. Buckle up, here’s the raw play-by-play.
My Pre-Jordan “Routine” (Let’s Be Honest)
Before this? Mostly just hitting the weights 3-4 times a week, whatever felt sore or looked fun. Cardio? Only when I felt guilty about pizza night. Diet? “Mostly healthy” with generous cheat windows. Yeah, solid dad-bod maintenance plan.
How It Went Down This Week
Monday: The “Oh Sht” Moment
Woke up stupid early, fueled by hype. Grabbed a photo of Jordan posing (don’t judge, needed a visual target!), plastered it near the coffee maker. First mission: his cardio claims. Says he does fasted AM walks. Thought, “Easy, I walk the dog!” Nope. Did a solid 45 minutes BRISK, actually sweating before breakfast. Felt hungry enough to eat the couch.
- Chest/Back Day: Usual weights? Threw that out. Hit way higher reps with lighter weights than normal, focusing purely on feeling the muscle squeeze – like, mentally picturing that beach body shot. Holy burn! Ended with core circuits until my abs screamed.
Wednesday: Calling in Reinforcements (The Diet)
Realized my “mostly chicken” wasn’t cutting it. Needed structure. Made a list:
- Protein UP: Chicken breast became my religion. Eggs, fish, protein shakes – chugged them like water.
- Carbs DOWN: Said bye-bye to extra rice, pasta mountains. Stuck to veggies and a fistful of complex carbs only post-workout.
- Greens EVERYWHERE: Salads became mandatory sidekicks for every meal. Drank water like a desert survivor.
Felt hangry AF by Wednesday afternoon. Snacked on hard-boiled eggs like a goblin.
Friday: Embrace the Suck
Shoulders & Arms Day: Went full “pump mode.” Again, lighter weights (felt embarrassing next to the grunting dudes), but slower reps, constant tension. Stopped counting reps, just went until the muscle literally couldn’t lift anymore. Arms felt like swollen sausages. Also doubled the core work – planks, leg raises, twists. Abs felt bruised underneath.
Cardio round two: Pushed the walk to 50 minutes, tried some incline. Legs were lead.
Sunday: Mirror Check & Brutal Honesty
Stared hard at the mirror after 7 days. No, I don’t suddenly look like Jordan (duh). BUT:
- Waist feels tighter? For sure.
- Muscles look sharper, especially around shoulders and chest? Hell yeah.
- Abs peeking through the usual fluff? Okay, maybe just a little more definition. Progress!
Biggest change? Feel exhausted but also weirdly “cleaner”? Like, less bloated junk floating around inside.
The Ugly Truths I Learned
- It’s WORK: This ain’t magic. It’s constant focus on form, insane reps, and zero diet wiggle room. Requires scary discipline.
- Diet is KING (or Queen): Lifting heavy alone won’t carve you out. Gotta eat like a sculptor carefully chipping away fat.
- It’s “Light” but BRUTAL: Using lighter weights felt weird, but deliberately maxing out every single rep fries your muscles harder than chasing max weight ever did. DOMS city.
- Cardio Isn’t Optional: Those walks are secret weapons for burning that extra layer hiding the abs. Non-negotiable.
Verdict? Look, it gave me a kickstart I desperately needed. Showed me exactly where my usual slack routine was failing. Will I do this intensity forever? Probably not – gotta keep sane. But core focus, higher reps with strict form, and a MUCH stricter diet? Those are staying. Heading back in tomorrow – maybe the abs will wave back this week.
