Alright so I finally tried that semi mullet thing everyone’s talking about. Looked cool on some dude from TikTok but man, I almost wrecked my hair figuring it out. Here’s exactly how it went down.
The Starting Point
Grabbed my tools first. Found my old clippers buried under bathroom junk – dusty as heck. Wiped ’em off, plugged ’em in, hoped they still worked. Had regular kitchen scissors too, the sharp ones my wife hides from me. Forgot proper barber shears, obviously. Found a comb missing half its teeth. This was gonna be messy.
Winging The First Cut
Turned those clippers on and just went for it. Started high up on the sides, around a number 4 guard. Made that horrible buzzing noise cutting through weeks of grown-out fluff. Took big chunks off, aiming for that short-on-sides look. Felt weird seeing so much hair hit the sink.
- Looked in the mirror – left side looked okay, right side? Wonky as hell. Way shorter near my ear.
- Panicked a bit, tried to fix it with the guard off. Big mistake. Got a bald-ish patch. Cursed loud enough my cat ran out.
- Switched to scissors for the top. Just grabbed random sections, snipping off maybe two inches? No plan. Ended up with this choppy mess hanging over my eyes.
Going Full Mullet Mode
This is where it got scary. Pulled all the hair at the very back together into a sad little ponytail with my fingers. Held it out, closed my eyes, and snip! Cut it way shorter than I meant to. Was going for gradual, got cliff face. Freaked out and just started point-cutting the ends like crazy with the scissors to soften it. Shook my head hard – shorter bits flew everywhere like dandruff.
- Checked the back. It stuck out weirdly. Mullet? More like duck butt.
- Grabbed my cheap hair wax, the stickiest one I own. Rubbed a massive glob between my palms and just mashed it into the back sections.
- Fiddled for ten minutes trying to make it look messy on purpose. Finally got some strands sticking out sideways. Good enough.
The Big Reveal
Stood back, sucked in my gut, looked in the big mirror. Sides were uneven as sin, that bald patch near my ear screamed, and the back stuck out like I slept on it wet. But honestly? Put on a wrinkled band tee I found on the floor and it kinda… clicked. Messy fit the messy hair. Perfection? Nah. Cool weird vibe? Absolutely.
Would I trust me to cut your hair? Hell no. But if you’ve got clippers, junk scissors, and zero fear? Go nuts. It grows back, always. Mostly.
