The Leeds Road Experiment
Wanted to take the family somewhere different last bank holiday. Saw Leeds Road mentioned online – photos looked nice, trees, old buildings, whatever. Figured “how bad could it be?” Boy, was I stupid.
Woke up early, packed the kids into the car. Thought leaving at 8am would beat traffic. Ha! Took two bloody hours just to crawl into town. Leeds Road runs right through the city center, turns out. Sunday drivers everywhere, delivery vans blocking lanes – total chaos. Spent more time watching some idiot trying to parallel park than actually moving.
First mistake: Going on a weekend. Leeds Road ain’t some quiet country lane. It’s like the main vein pumping traffic into Leeds. Trucks, buses, tourists – everyone uses it. My wife was white-knuckling the dashboard while I dodged cyclists popping out of nowhere.
Parked near Kirkgate Market. Cost me £12 for three hours. Robbery. Walked towards Leeds Road itself – instantly smelled the fried food and exhaust fumes. Kids started moaning immediately:
- Screaming baby from the cafe patio next to us
- Buses belching black smoke every two minutes
- Some lad puking near the bus stop (strong lager smell at 10:30am, impressive)
Second mistake: Assuming the “best time” meant sunny afternoons. Sun came out alright – bounced off all the glass buildings and car windscreens like laser beams. No shade anywhere. Had to squint just to see the Victorian architecture people rave about.
Tried taking photos. Impossible. Every shot had:
- Red double-decker bus plowing through the frame
- Tourist selfie sticks waving like antennae
- Delivery guy on a moped photobombing
Gave up after five minutes. Kids demanded ice cream. Found a place – queue out the door. Stood baking in the concrete heat while some bloke argued about vegan options. Paid £4 for a single scoop that melted before we got back to the kerb.
The “aha” moment came when a local saw us sweating on a bench. Laughed and said: “Shoulda come pre-9am midweek mate. Only bin lorries and nutters jogging then. Empty as anything.” Felt proper mugged off. All those blogs said “sunny afternoons” – total nonsense when you’re dodging traffic.
Left after two hours. Kids melted down in the car park. Steering wheel was hot enough to fry eggs. Sat in more gridlock trying to escape Leeds. Saw a sign for the M1 – felt like seeing the gates of heaven.
Lessons learned? Don’t trust pretty pictures. Leeds Road needs military timing:
- When: Tuesday to Thursday, before 9am. After 5pm’s still packed.
- Weather: Overcast days are your friend. Sun turns it into a frypan.
- Skip: Food vans. Go three streets back for actual cafes.
- Photos: Wide angle. Accept that buses own the road.
Will I go back? Maybe. In February. With earplugs. And a flask.
