Alright so this week I got curious about UFC fighter recovery stuff after seeing Nate Diaz’s beat-up face online. Dude always looks like he went through a meat grinder post-fight. Figured I’d try mimicking his recovery steps myself – cheap version, obviously. Here’s how the whole experiment went down.
The Ice Phase & First Cleanup
First thing I did? Grabbed a cheap bag of frozen peas from my freezer – the classic ghetto ice pack. Slapped that right on my left cheekbone while sitting on my bathroom floor. Mimicking fight-night cooling, ya know? Kept it there for 20 minutes on, 10 minutes off, repeating three times total. Skin went numb and kinda red, but the “swelling” (aka leftover pizza puffiness) chilled out.
Peeled the bag off and stared hard in the mirror. Zero actual bruises (bummer), but I noticed a tiny cut from shaving. Close enough. Ran warm water in the sink, dumped in some generic antibacterial soap I found under the sink – smelled like fake lemons. Gently swished my face with it, avoiding the eyes. Water turned murky fast. Dried off with a clean towel, pressing lightly.
Patching Up & Products Used
Went digging in my sad first-aid drawer. Found:
- Hydrocolloid acne patches (stole one from my wife’s stash)
- Basic petroleum jelly from a travel kit
- Old bottle of arnica gel (expired last year, whatever)
- Generic ibuprofen pills
Slapped that hydrocolloid patch right over my fake “gash.” Dabbed arnica gel everywhere else on that side of my face like I was painting a fence – smelled weirdly herbal. Took one ibuprofen just to commit fully. Felt silly, but hey, process is process.
The Next 48 Hours Grind
Woke up next morning face feeling tight. Patch had swollen up with gunk – kinda gross, kinda satisfying. Peeled it off carefully. The tiny cut looked way less angry. Reapplied arnica gel religiously every 4 hours like clockwork, even setting phone alarms. Avoided hot showers like they were poison, stuck with lukewarm splashes. Didn’t sleep on that side – rolled onto my back like a dead beetle all night. Sore neck. Worth it? Maybe?
Day two: Zero swelling left (surprise surprise), that tiny cut was basically gone. Bruises still MIA though. Started feeling impatient. Remembered Nate soaks in Epsom salt baths sometimes. Didn’t have any, so I dissolved table salt in warm water, soaked a washcloth, and slapped it on my face like a weird compress. Meh.
Final Check & Takeaways
By day three? Face looked normal. Biggest lesson: Ice + keeping crap clean works fast, even for minor stuff. The hydrocolloid patch was legit for wound healing – that thing sucked out junk overnight. Arnica? Who knows if it did squat, but the ritual felt proactive. Main takeaway? Fighters heal fast cause they attack recovery hard immediately and stay consistent. My face wasn’t shredded, but the process itself clicked. Consistency is king, and even cheap supplies get you 80% there. Wasn’t picture-perfect Nate-level damage, but the recovery mindset? Solid experiment. Good enough for this broke blogger.
