So, you’d think knowing when to concede a putt in golf is a simple thing, right? Just a friendly nod, “pick it up.” Man, I used to think that too. Turns out, it’s a whole can of worms, and I learned that the hard way, mostly by messing it up spectacularly a few times.
It’s not just about being nice or speeding up play, though that’s part of it. It’s this weird, unwritten code that changes with who you’re playing with, what’s on the line, and even how the wind is blowing, metaphorically speaking. I used to be all over the place with it. Sometimes I’d give everything, sometimes I’d make folks putt out tap-ins. Talk about inconsistent. My buddies probably thought I was nuts, or just plain mean on certain days.
My “System” Forged in Fire (Well, Awkward Silences)
There wasn’t one big “aha!” moment, more like a series of them. I remember this one round, playing with a new group. Nice guys, mostly. I was trying to be generous, you know, make a good impression. So, I gave this one fella a putt, maybe two and a half feet, a little downhill slider. He just looked at me, then at his ball, then back at me. Didn’t say a word. Potted it anyway, stone-faced. Later, I heard through the grapevine he thought I was patronizing him, like I didn’t think he could make it. Yikes.
Then there was the flip side. Playing in our regular Saturday game, a bit more competitive, but still for fun. My opponent had this absolute gimme, like, six inches. I was distracted, looking for my ball in the rough or something, and didn’t say anything. He stood over it, waited, then finally tapped it in with this exaggerated sigh. The atmosphere for the next few holes? Frosty. Apparently, I’d broken some unspoken rule of our group for those super short ones.
It made me realize I didn’t really have a clue. I was just winging it, and it was causing more grief than good. So, I started to actually think about it, to watch how other, more experienced players handled it. It wasn’t about some rigid rule, but more like a dance.
So, after all that, here’s kinda what I settled on. It’s not perfect, but it keeps the peace and the game moving, most of the time.
- The “No-Brainers”: Anything inside the “circle of friendship” – you know, that super-close range where if they miss, it’s almost an accident. Usually, this is anything I can comfortably scoop back with my putter head without really stretching. If it’s that close, just pick it up. Don’t even ask. This avoids those awkward “are you gonna give me that?” stares.
- Context is King: Is it the first hole and we’re all just warming up? I’m probably more generous. Is it the 18th and the match is on the line for a five-dollar nassau? Well, then you might be putting out a two-footer, especially if it’s got some break. But even then, if it’s dead straight and short, what’s the point of the extra pressure?
- Read the Room (and the Player): This is the big one. Some folks want to putt everything. They get a rhythm, they like the feeling of the ball dropping. If you give them too many, they feel like they’re not really playing. Other guys, they’re happy to pick up anything under three feet. You get a feel for it. If I’m playing with someone new, I’m a bit more cautious. I might wait for them to look up, or I’ll say something like, “That looks pretty good to me, if you want it?” Lets them make the call without feeling pressured.
- My Own Putts: I generally don’t expect putts to be given unless they’re ridiculously short. If someone gives me one that’s a bit generous, I’ll just say “thanks” and scoop it. No big deal. I try not to overthink what they’re thinking.
- Pace of Play Factor: If the group behind is breathing down our necks, and someone has a tricky two-footer for a double bogey, sometimes it’s just better for everyone’s sanity to say “that’s good” and move on. The game is supposed to be enjoyable, not a five-hour slog.
Ultimately, my approach became less about strict adherence to some imaginary rulebook and more about keeping the game flowing and maintaining good relationships with my playing partners. I figured if I was going to spend four hours with these people, it was better if we were all generally getting along. Conceding a putt, or not, is a surprisingly big part of that little social contract on the golf course. It’s not rocket science, but it did take me a while to stop crashing the rocket, you know?
